Birthdays and the Power of Reflection
Every year when my birthday comes around, I pause to reflect. Not just on the passage of time, but on the choices—big and small—that have shaped my life. Birthdays remind us that we’re writing our own stories, page by page, year by year.
This year, as I reflected on my journey, one theme stood out more than anything else: the power of choosing love. Because when I’ve chosen love over fear, over conformity, and over doubt, I’ve been able to truly find peace.
The Courage to Choose a Different Path
I’ve always thought of myself as a nonconformist. Over the years, I’ve made choices that surprised others—and sometimes even surprised myself.
- I moved to a new country, far from family and friends.
- I navigated the challenges of divorce.
- I stepped away from the church I was raised in to explore my own beliefs.
- I built a new life as an immigrant in the U.S.
- And eventually, I fell in love and remarried—to a wonderful “gringo.”
Every one of these decisions required reinvention. They pushed me to confront fear, release expectations, and lean into love. Looking back, I realize that with each step, I wasn’t just building a new life—I was learning how to find peace in places I never thought to look.
When “Having It All” Isn’t Enough
For a long time, I believed I had created the perfect life. I had a beautiful home, two loving dogs, and friendships that ran deep. From the outside, my world looked ideal—and for a while, I convinced myself that it felt ideal on the inside too.
But slowly, a dissonance began to grow. Despite all the good around me, I felt profoundly unhappy in my career as a physician. What had once felt like a calling started to feel like a cage. And the dissatisfaction didn’t stay confined to my job—it spilled into every part of my life.
I felt stuck. I worked harder, tried to “fix” myself, and carried guilt for feeling ungrateful. But nothing shifted.
The Turning Point: Finding Peace Through Coaching
In an act of desperation—and hope—I decided to try something new: Life Coaching. At first, I didn’t know what to expect. Could changing my mindset really make a difference in how I felt about my life?
The answer was yes.
Life coaching didn’t change the external circumstances of my career overnight, but it changed the way I thought, felt, and responded. Coaching helped me uncover beliefs that were keeping me stuck and taught me how to create new ones that served me better.
Through coaching, I’ve learned that:
- Finding peace starts with awareness. Recognizing my thoughts and how they shape my emotions was the first step.
- Love is always an option. Whether in how I treat myself, how I engage with patients, or how I approach challenges, I can choose love over frustration.
- Happiness isn’t selfish. When I make space for joy, travel, and rest, I show up more fully for everyone around me.
Today, I’m reconnecting with the people I love most. I’m more present with my patients. I’m kinder to myself. In short, I’ve discovered that when you change your mindset, you can truly find peace.
A Birthday Celebration in Aruba
This year’s birthday felt like a celebration of everything I’ve learned and embraced. I spent it in Aruba, with my toes in the sand and dinner by the sea. It wasn’t just a vacation—it was a declaration that my life deserves joy, rest, and renewal.
I also arrived early for the Women Physicians Wellness (WPW) Conference, where I earned 18 CMEs and had the privilege of sharing my own coaching program. Being in a room full of women physicians, each working toward wellness, was powerful. It reminded me that this journey isn’t just about me—it’s about helping others too.
My goal moving forward is simple but profound: to help as many women physicians as possible find the peace and happiness they deserve.
Why Choosing Love Matters
So why do I emphasize choosing love? Because it’s easy to let fear or doubt dictate our decisions. Fear says, “Stay safe. Don’t rock the boat.” Doubt whispers, “You’re not enough. You’ll never succeed.”
But love says something different. Love says, “You are worthy. You are capable. You can create the life you want.”
Every time I’ve chosen love, I’ve moved closer to peace. Love led me to embrace change, seek coaching, rebuild my life, and rediscover joy.
And if you’ve been searching for how to find peace in your own life, I can promise you this: choosing love is always the right place to start.
How You Can Start to Find Peace
If you’re in a season of reflection—whether it’s your birthday or just an ordinary day—here are a few steps to help you shift toward peace:
1. Reflect on Your Journey
Look back at the choices that shaped your life. Which ones came from love, and which ones came from fear? Awareness is the first step to change.
2. Practice Self-Compassion
Finding peace requires gentleness with yourself. Speak to yourself as you would to a friend you cherish.
3. Make Space for Joy
Schedule time for what lights you up—travel, creativity, nature, or simple rest. Joy is not optional; it’s restorative.
4. Challenge Limiting Beliefs
Ask yourself: What story am I telling myself that keeps me stuck? Then rewrite that story with love at the center.
5. Seek Support
Coaching, counseling, or peer groups can provide guidance and accountability as you reframe your mindset and pursue peace.
Choosing Love, Choosing Peace
As I step into this new year of my life, I am choosing a life filled with love. Not because it’s always easy, but because it’s always worth it.
Love has led me through the hardest seasons. It’s been the force behind every reinvention. And it’s given me the courage to release old stories and write new ones.
Most importantly, love has shown me the way to find peace—a peace that no external achievement could give me.
So here’s my question to you:
What will you choose?
Thank you for being here.
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